Recently I came to a shocking realization about myself , I am turning into one of those skinny bitches that I have always despised ,yet thrived to be part of their entourage.
Back in the days I was –or at least this is how I used to refer as myself –the kind ,giving ,always there type of friend ,that will never leave a friend or anyone she knows in times of need whether it Is a bad break up, a victim of a social stunt or even final exams ,I would do hugs , errands and chores , listen to endless whining or even volunteer for devious vengeance plotting and the minute this situation ended for the person in Question I will just go back in my totally unacknowledged state ,with my calls never answered and my name never considered for hangouts , parties or even study groups .
And I would usually condone myself of how good of a friend I am, and that one day karma will work in my favor and just like a cliché from every movie out there, everyone will eventually come to their senses on how good I am and will be fighting to be my friend, I even took it as far as preparing how I would be replying the apologies and praise I will be receiving on that joyous inevitable lucky day that ofcourse never happened anywhere except in my head.
Now I couldn’t care less what other people feel and I am kinda shocked of my newly acquired ability of uttering the “Fuck off” notion in many different ways, even to those who are supposed to be my close circle, that help me with everything starting from impulsive shopping sprees to proof read my college assignments or even be supportive in the bad hair days.
Do we lose the extra kilos along with the last shreds of humanity and decency, could someone like me turn into the complete opposite over the course of few months or a couple of years? with those thoughts racing in my mind I came to a new revelation that I never really gave a rat’s ass about anyone before , I just needed the attention and now that I earned it on many different levels , I don’t need to feign concern about anyone any more on the contrary it would hurt my image if I did.
They say a BITCH , is a Babe In Total Control of Herself and that’s me baby , always was and forever ever will be ,yes Karma is a bitch and so am I ..